April Update

Hello everyone! It has been just over a month since our very first entry! First, thank you all so much for all the comments and texts of love and support! It has been very surreal feeling bringing smiles to our faces to hear from our loved ones as they received our announcement. Thank you! And thank you for checking back monthly! It is our goal to provide an update once a month.

For those who have already been shopping and sending gifts from our registry, you are angels. Talk about surreal! Not only because people are showering us so early in the process but also to start hangs items in our home A reminder that our time with our little is closer than ever before! Thank you! Thank you! Thank you!

Here’s a question we have received that we are happy to answer:

Q: Are you going to have a baby shower?

A: Not in the traditional sense. Our current feelings are that if there are any big gatherings of celebrations, it would be more of a “sip and see” once the baby is here and we are all settled. Our reasoning is to protect our mental and emotional wellness. We are not sure what our journey looks like, what our relationship with our birth family looks like, and there will be many unknowns, even after birth.

If our child is born in Texas, the legal relinquishment window is 48 hours. Meaning, 48 hours must pass from birth, before birth mother can sign off on relinquishment. Decisions can be changed during that time. This relinquishment process is similar in all other states but the time period tends to be longer. Once our family is together, celebrations will be planned!

This month we attended a HH at Gladney to meet other families in our same program and to meet the new social workers that will be guiding us. It was a lovely evening meeting families in the area, sharing our stories, and being within company that understands “it” all.

A few months ago, shortly after the holidays, I (Anna) reached out to our social worker at Gladney, vulnerably seeking reassurance and resources to help support me/us during this waiting period. I was given a list of books, articles, and online courses….but they all seemed to glaze over this particular part of the journey, the waiting part, and the focus was post placement.

Naturally, and not surprising I’m sure, I created a flyer that the social workers could forward to all the “mamas in waiting” with my phone number on it. I was desperate for connection, conversation, validation, and community as a mama in waiting myself. And I wasn’t alone! Out of the 27 mamas in DFW going through this program, 10 texted me!

I was not alone! A group chat was created, some of the families were at the Gladney HH where we could meet in person, and on May I am hosting another get together! I am excited to see where these connections lead and hopeful we can find comfort together.

Lastly, we lost our boy, eldest dog, Bowie. On Patrick’s birthday, we had a beautiful morning together as our family of four, and that afternoon ushered Bowie from earthside to beyond. A huge piece of our family is missing and our hearts are broken. I am devastated that my Bowie is gone, and the thought that him and our child won’t know each other earthside, is beyond painful. Thank you to everyone for all of your love and support during this time of loss for our family.

Thank you for keeping in touch with us and staying through this update! We will be back in May!

-Anna